I find the reminder of death liberating.
Kind of like Marla in Chuck Palahniuk’s fight club…
This is your life and it’s ending one minute at a time. When people think you’re dying they really listen to you… without just waiting for their turn to speak. Marla’s philosophy was that she might die any moment. The tragedy, she said, was that she didn’t… When the fight was over, nothing was solved, but nothing mattered.
It’s a type of grim poetry, romancing my little bohemian heart.
What can I say? I identify with the concept. Marla and I, we would’ve been friends.
Because when you dance and entertain the idea of death, you feel more alive… and it offers clarity. Suddenly all the bullshit of the day-to-day disintegrates into a pile of forgotten funeral pyre ash. Just. Like. That.
It’s with this perky perspective that I created this ‘before I die list’. They’re the type of things that really matters to me.
THE LIST (so what if I’m dreaming):
- Try Ayahuasca with a shaman
- Join a barefoot movement project http://www.barefootcollege.org/category/bunker-roy/
- Collect oral histories from indigenous tribes
- Open an organic cafe and a herbal remedy store
- Contribute to an eco-housing and agriculture project
- Learn Tagalog
- Brew my own vodka and beer (think how useful that would be)
- Teach yoga
- Learn to fly a plane (preferably with my retired pilot uncle if he’s still capable – damn cataracts!)
- Work with a Filipino community to set up social enterprises in the style of Ernesto Sirolli (this is in the pipeline)
- Live in Mexico just to smoke rolled tobacco, drink tequila and write poetry
- Create a video documentary about my mother. She has the most incredible stories. And I would like to be able to show my future kids, grand kids, etc, what resilience and strength really looks like.
- Build my own earthship (self-sufficient housing) and tree house and develop my own nuclear bunker (because I’m a bit of a paranoid Psycho like that)
- Write a book
- Eat Gelato in Rom
- Do a Ted Talk
- Explore the world with someone I’m madly in love with (sap, sap, sappy who woulda thought)
- Know with every screaming cell in my hot-tempered body that I listened, that I cared, and that I helped